Monday, October 21, 2013

Fe: Fueled by Faith

I've been dealing with an injury for a while now.  I have issues with the alignment of my pelvis - one side is rotated forward, and the other is rotated backwards - essentially, it's twisted.  This has caused serious problems with lower body training in the past, but recently, it's gotten worse.  Squatting is not only painful, but nearly impossible to do - the length difference from my right leg to my left impacts my ability to set my feet and sit straight back into a squat.  The pressure and torque on my right knee was more than I could bear, and  I was actually having lower back pain and spasms just a little over a month ago.  I also began experiencing tightness and stiffness through my upper back and neck because of it.    I had seen a chiropractor previously for similar issues, but after 12 weeks of rigorous treatment, I sort of got out of the habit of going.  I didn't feel pain, so I didn't need treatment...or so I thought.

I sought chiropractic care again after having back spasms for the first time.  I'm seeing my regular chiropractor again now, but the chiropractor I initially saw the first several weeks of treatment suggested yoga.  The tightness of my muscles, combined with my muscular development over the past few months (Thanks, Layne!!), really exacerbated my condition.    Obviously, and shamefully - I'm incredibly UNflexible.  My hamstrings are always tight - have been since I was a child - and my hip flexors stay tight as well.  In the past I haven't dedicated nearly as much time to flexibility and stretching in my training as I should have.  The mere thought of taking a yoga class - surrounded by women with who were sure to have flexibility matched only by Gumby - gave me sweaty palms and an elevated heart rate. I opted instead to incorporate serious corrective exercise into my training, along with stretching and foam roller work.

In the weeks since I've been seeking treatment, I've seen improvement, although I'm nowhere near 100% yet.  Dealing with an physical limitation of this caliber has really opened my eyes, though, and has been a blessing in disguise of sorts.   See, my goal has always been to be a well-rounded athlete - to not simply LOOK the part of health and fitness but to actually perform like a healthy, fit athlete.  I realized that I have really neglected some of the parts of physical training - flexibility, obviously, but also endurance and functional aspects  - that serve to make me well-rounded.  That alone is shameful to me.  I also realized that part of the reason I have neglected these aspects is FEAR.  I have been fueled by FEAR.  I was afraid of taking a yoga class.  I was afraid of tackling endurance sports.  That is incredibly shameful to me, and hard for me to admit, especially as a woman of faith.

In 1 Corinthians 6, Paul enumerates a list of qualities and character traits that, if possessed, will prevent a person from inheriting the Kingdom of God.  He includes thieves, greedy people, drunks, abusive people, and those who cheat others, to name a few.  He follows this list by saying, "Some of you were once like that.  But you were cleansed; you were made holy; you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the spirit of our God."  (1 Cor 6:11 NLT, emph added.)   You see, at the time, these were the traits people were struggling with - the things of their former selves.  Each of us, individually, has traits that we struggled with before we were made new in Christ.  For me, the person I once was like was insecure, discontent, lonely, and motivated by fear.  I can honestly say I that while I still battle insecurity at times, I am no longer suffocated with the feeling of inadequacy that used to weigh me down.  I have learned to be content, no matter my situation, and I'm never lonely.  I didn't realize until recently, however, that I was still struggling with one of the traits of my former self - fear.   That's a trademark of the person I was once.  It's not a trait of the person I am today.

Once I realized this, I knew I had to change it.  When I don't like something in my life, that's what I do.  I change it.  I don't wait for Monday, next week, or next month.  I start immediately.   This is no different - if anything, there's a certain urgency to this because I want to throw off the things of my former self and step out into the woman God created me to be.

After a lot of prayer and thought about how to change this, I decided to embark on a year-long journey of trying new fitness-related things.  2 Timothy 1:7 is one of my favorite scriptures.  It tells us, "For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline" (NLT).  I have leaned on this countless times, and I am leaning on it now.  I am NOT FEARFUL.  I am NOT TIMID.   I am POWERFUL. I am LOVING.  I am DISCIPLINED.  I'm calling my journey Fe:  Fueled by Faith.  It's a reminder to me of what drives me each day:  I will not be guided by fear.  I will step outside of my comfort zone, and I will be guided by faith.

To hold myself accountable, and to also inspire other women, I'm making my journey public.  I realize I'm not the only woman to be held back by fear of failure, fear of embarrassment, fear of judgment, and fear of inadequacy.   Each month, I'll pick a new activity that I've never done before and I'll do it at least once a week...and I'm inviting you to do it with me!!  Now, this is the really exciting part:  instead of waiting for January of 2014, I'm starting now!! This month, I'm tackling yoga.  I started at home the week after Gateway Naturals, and I actually really enjoy it.  I'm not any good at it - yet! - but it's definitely helped with my stiffness.   Maybe someday, I'll have Gumby-like flexibility, too, but that would just be an awesome bonus.  For now, yoga is different.  I'm a very passive person by nature, and the gym is an outlet for my aggression.  Yoga is the polar opposite of aggressive - it's passive, and relaxing.  Obviously, I'm going to continue training in the gym with weights - that's my passion!!  The things I do for Fueled by Faith will just complement my training schedule.

Some of my other prospects for fitness include taking local classes (kickboxing classes, cardio classes, spin classes, you name it!), biking, swimming - anything.  If it scares me when I think of trying it, it definitely has to go on the list!

Here's the fun part:  I'm open to suggestions!  Email me or comment below with your suggestions for activities to try, and let me know if you're sharing the  faith-fueled journey with me!

Come back in a few days to hear about my latest adventure as a yogini.  Until then...

TRAIN HARD - LIFT HEAVY - FUEL YOUR BODY - FEED YOUR FAITH

F


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